Self-Esteem quiz
1. I allow myself to make mistakes, realizing that we all learn from failure.
a) never or hardly at all b) sometimes c) frequently d) very often
2. My value as a person depends greatly on what others think of me.
a) never or hardly at all b) sometimes c) frequently d) very often
3. Whether I’m celebrating a success or getting through a rough period, I “reward” myself in self-defeating ways, e.g. overeating, or going on a spending spree when I am already in debt.
a) never or hardly at all b) sometimes c) frequently d) very often
4. I have trouble asking others for favours and tend to apologize a lot.
a) never or hardly at all b) sometimes c) frequently d) very often
5. I’d rather keep an unsatisfactory item than return it to the store. In a restaurant I’ll eat a meal, even if it isn’t what I ordered, rather than return it to the waiter.
a) never or hardly at all b) sometimes c) frequently d) very often
6. I berate myself for saying or doing the wrong thing, calling myself “stupid.”
a) never or hardly at all b) sometimes c) frequently d) very often
7. I would do something against my better judgment rather than risk another person’s disapproval.
a) never or hardly at all b) sometimes c) frequently d) very often
8. When I look at myself in the mirror, I see only my flaws.
a) never or hardly at all b) sometimes c) frequently d) very often
9. I think of how my life would improve if only I were smarter or better looking.
a) never or hardly at all b) sometimes c) frequently d) very often
10. I graciously accept compliments and praise instead of tossing them aside.
a) never or hardly at all b) sometimes c) frequently d) very often
11. I do things which nurture, strengthen and relax my body.
a) never or hardly at all b) sometimes c) frequently d) very often
12. I am able to accept my vulnerable feelings like sadness, fear or anxiety.
a) never or hardly at all b) sometimes c) frequently d) very often
13. When I need comfort, I am able to turn to friends or family and let them know how I feel.
a) never or hardly at all b) sometimes c) frequently d) very often
14. I am comfortable expressing my angry feelings.
a) never or hardly at all b) sometimes c) frequently d) very often
15. I am able to assert my needs and wants with family members, colleagues or my friends.
a) never or hardly at all b) sometimes c) frequently d) very often
16. I recognize and value my need for solitude or “quiet time.”
a) never or hardly at all b) sometimes c) frequently d) very often
17. I actively pursue and maintain friendships with people I truly like.
a) never or hardly at all b) sometimes c) frequently d) very often
18. I balance my life with pleasure and fun, recognizing that I work harder when I am well rested.
a) never or hardly at all b) sometimes c) frequently d) very often
SCORING
Now add up all your points as shown below.
question 1: a-1, b-2, c-3, d-4
questions 2 through 9: a-4, b-3, c-2, d-1
questions 10 through 18: a-1, b-2, c-3, d-4
RESULTS
1-18 POOR
You rely heavily on other people’s opinions and find it hard to assert yourself in your professional or personal life. You are so anxious to please others that you often ignore your own needs and wants. You are also prone to rewarding yourself in self-destructive ways (e.g. overeating). It is important for you to do things that will nurture you – such as reading a book, swimming, walking in nature or just listening to music.
19-36 FAIR
Although you make sure that you honour your commitments to others, you are often self-critical and overly demanding of yourself. You are quick to blame yourself when things go wrong. Learn to be more tolerant of your own mistakes and pay less attention to what others may think. You do manage to find time for what’s important in your life, which gives you a feeling of satisfaction.
37-54 GOOD
You know who you are and what you need to be happy and usually are willing to take the time to do something that will fulfill you. You are always trying to improve yourself and surround yourself with supportive friends or family. You see your strengths but may need to learn to work with your weaknesses. For example, you may have a short attention span and work best in spurts. By recognizing this and giving yourself frequent breaks, you will be more productive.
55-72 EXCELLENT
Congratulations! You have a deeply developed sense of self and are self-nurturing. You respect your own feelings as well as those of others and have no qualms about turning to friends or family when you are in need of comfort. You are patient with yourself. If you feel a resistance to doing something, you get to the root of your feelings instead of forcing yourself to go ahead. You lead a healthy, well-balanced life.
